Depression Survivors – Lessons, Inspirations and Motivation for Indian Men

In the last article we dealt with the situations that could lead to clinical depression in 45 plus Indian men. The article suggested some simple exercises or yoga postures, natural food supplements which could help people with suspected depression, of course taking help additionally from family, friends and physicians. While writing this article I also noticed that although there are many cases of depression in India, the age group below 35 is more vocal about their issues, compared to 45 plus adults. What is stopping these men from voicing their concern, is it social stigma? Fear of being ridiculed by close people around them? Fear of isolation once everyone comes to know about their mental health? What else could be the reason?
In this article, lets talk about two extreme cases of 45 plus men. Cases where men have come out of this condition by taking medicines and indulging in self-help and other extreme where people have felt left out and vented their experiences in public platform and did nothing about it. This segment will deal with solutions and how each of these options can be considered by Indian men to tackle depression or anxiety or mood swings.
The following cases have been collected from various forum available on public domain such as It’s OK to Talk, Time-to-change, adaa.org, Indian express, etc. (accessible to all) and gives a hint of the probable causes behind the 40 plus Indian man who suffer from mental health issues mainly depression. For the sake of confidentiality, I have not used their name, but mentioned their age and location and date on which they had voiced their concerns in public.

Case 1: March 20, 2019; Age: 58 years; Gurgaon, India (Ref: It’s OK To Talk)
The writer of this article felt that he was suffering from depression and schizophrenia and unfortunately he never found any forum or got a shoulder to cry or share his problems. He vented out his emotions on a public platform on a day when his family went out for a movie without him. The gentleman had already lost his wife, and was living with his son’s family. This was a trigger point as the writer of the article had been experiencing something like that for the past 30 years. Finally he vented out and must have been relieved momentarily. But is that phase over, probably not. He still must be feeling rejected, low and depressed in life. I will name this group of people “Need Motivation in Life”.

It’s a common phenomenon seen in Indian males who have lost their spouse and have crossed the prime and are left with limited options than to stay with children and their family. The sense of rejection triggers anger, aloofness and disturbances leading to less sleep, agitation and early stages of depression. So what could be the possible solutions for such age group? If you ask experts they will always suggest such patients to go out for a walk or socialize or spend more time with family or get involved with household work or get involved with religious practices. My understanding is slightly different, having observed the 45 plus men around me, I can say it is very difficult to get into any of these, unless you really are in the right mental frame. I really cant sit through a religious discourse or watch Television for house. I am sure there will be many like me, who might be looking for newer options. So what can be the alternatives? So lets explore some suggestions that could be considered by Indian men, however, the readers may use their discretion while selecting these solutions.

Case 2: February 1, 2018; Age: 53 years; New Delhi, India (Ref: Times of India)
The writer of this article developed depression inspite of being a successful businessman. What triggered the conditions were the writer’s wife illness and his business not doing great as per his expectations. Well that is relatable, as you will find several such cases in your family and neighborhood. The writer started developing negative thoughts, loss of appetite, before he got in touch with Live Love Laugh Foundation in Benagluru who had then put him in touch with counsellors (psychiatrists) who put him on medicines and recommended change of life style. Now the writer play harmonica and works out at the gym at the age of 53 years.

This is a different case than case#1, not very common yet achievable. It’s a myth that Gym is for younger people, believe me, if you want to try it, then you will be surprised to find a lot of crowd of your age running on the treadmill. You can indulge in music or painting or any other hobby classes. That’s a fair way of treating your mind and body and I don’t see a reason why not. Lets find out some solutions for this group of people or “self motivators”. It just needs one step in the right direction to come out of the situation. Lets explore some solutions for this group of men.

Let’s Move On and Talk and may be you can be one of the followers or leaders, it does not matter. Form a group either online or offline or on whatsapp and talk. There are several people out there who are going through similar situations. Who knows you might motivate them in some way or the other. You can always motivate, inspire and share the lesson of your life with other and make a difference to theirs’.